Tag Archives: billiards television

Dr. Kildare

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Many celebrities are known to have picked up a cue stick offscreen. 

A small subset (e.g, Dustin Hoffman, Peter Falk, Jackie Gleason, Buster Keaton) have earned praise, even among the billiards community, for their skills. 

But, at the top of Mount Celebrity sits the true pantheon of pool players – i.e., those who might run 100 balls straight. This exclusive group includes Mark Twain, Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, and of course, Fred Astaire, who was known to practice 14:1 in his basement up to six hours a day and was friends with BCA Hall of Famers Dan DiLiberto and Ed Kelly, according to former Billiards Digest Contributing Editor George Fels.1

Mr. Astaire’s pool prowess is legendary, though largely unwitnessed by the general public. However, there is one exception. In 1965, in one of his few television roles, Mr. Astaire played Joe Quinlan, a warm-hearted pool shark, across four episodes of the medical drama television series Dr. Kildare. 

Though Dr. Kildare is quaint, maudlin and dated by today’s standards, the four episodes – “Fathers and Daughters” (November 22, 1965), “A Gift of Love” (November 23), “The Tent Dwellers” (November 29), and “Going Home” (November 30) – offer a wonderful lens for watching and appreciating Mr. Astaire, and equally important, for treating billiards with a modicum of respect. 

Dr. Kildare is an NBC medical drama series that ran from 1961 to 1966, for a total of 191 episodes over five seasons. Richard Chamberlain, a hitherto unknown actor,  played the eponymous doctor and quickly became a star and heartthrob. The episodes occur at the fictional Blair General Hospital, where Dr. Kildare tries to learn his profession, deal with patients’ problems, and win the respect of the senior Dr. Leonard Gillespie (Raymond Massey).

In the episode “Fathers and Daughters,” Sister Laurie Benjamin (Laura Devon), a medical missionary nun, returns from her field work with an advanced state of acute stem cell leukemia. She checks into Blair Hospital and is visited by her father, Joe Quinlan (Astaire), an affable, nomadic pool shark, who is in town for the Invitational Tournament of Champions: World’s Foremost Pocket Billiards Stars, with its $4,000 pot (approximately $38,000 today). Sister Benjamin lauds her father as “an artist – the greatest pocket billiard player in the whole world…on some occasions.” Describing his profession to Dr. Kildare, Quinlan jocularly explains, “My working equipment: a two piece pool cue.  The sight of it gives my sister a rash.”

Naturally, Sister Benjamin wishes to conceal the seriousness of her condition from her father; at the same time, her father wishes to downplay the severity of his shortness of breath and unusual chest palpitations, symptoms she soon learns are tied to his coronary heart disease.

In “A Gift for Love,” Quinlan fails to show up for his scheduled EKG.  Seeking to locate the absent patient, Dr. Kildare goes to the local pool room and learns that in only a week it will become the setting for an “elite” matchup, including “Ulysses ‘The Burglar’ Jackson from Newark New Jersey, Phil Carmichael from Detroit, Deacon Otis Potts of Kansas City, and the great Joe Quinlan, 16 superstars in all.”

Quinlan is located and teases us with a couple of shots, but he is ultimately brought back to the hospital, where he befriends Francis Healy (Harry Morgan, who would later become famous as Colonel Potter in M*A*S*H). Healy tells Quinlan there is another patient, Mr. Gaffney, who has taken a lot of money off of Healy in some not-so-friendly games of pool.  Healy asks for Quinlan’s help getting some of his money back. “Gaffney has two-thirds of the money in this state. He’s greedy and looking for blood. You could flub half a dozen shots and still beat this guy with a broomstick in your hand.” Sympathetic to Healy’s situation, Quinlan agrees to play, so long as he personally does have to bet any money.

In the penultimate “The Tent Dwellers” episode, we get to see Astaire, the master, at work. Quinlan plays Gaffney in a straight pool game to 50.  His shots are effortless. There is a beautiful combination that prompts Gaffney to initially say, “You make it and I will eat it like an egg, swallowing the thing whole.” (He makes it, though no cue ball is consumed.) The episode largely serves to enforce both Quinlan’s billiards skills and, more important, his altruism. 

While the medical staff chastise him for risking his health, Quinlan beseeches the doctors to give him a more honest assessment of his daughter’s health. Knowing her condition is worsening and concerned about her mounting hospital expenses, he says to no one, “Spare Laurie for those who need her most. Take a clown like me.”

Finally, in “Going Home,” Quinland disappears from the hospital once more. It’s no secret he has gone to compete in the tournament. Dr. Kildare and Healy follow. Naive to the sport, Dr. Kildare watches with awe as Healy explains the skill required to set up shots and run the table, and the economics behind the game, which often exist outside the main action. Healy surmises that Quinlan has “hocked everything but the sterling hair in his ears” to get in on action with big investors in order to ensure he has the means to pay for his daughter’s medical expenses.

SPOILER ALERT. The final match pits Quinlan against Ulysses Jackson (Harold ‘Red’Baker).2 The back-and-forth match gives both men a chance to demonstrate their skills. (Note: Mr. Astaire reportedly insisted on playing all his own pool on-camera – i.e., no cutaway hand shots – as a condition for appearing in the episodes.) Perspiring and periodically clutching at his chest, Quinlan ultimately wins the match, though he passes away shortly thereafter.  

Sister Benjamin, whose leukemia has miraculously gone into remission, is able to leave the hospital. She retrieves her father’s cue and case as a keepsake of his memories, but not before dispensing some billiards advice to a practicing player.  It’s a fitting coda; a hopeful suggestion that the spirit and power of billiards can transcend the individual and pass to the next generation. 

The four episodes from the fifth season of Dr. Kildare are available to purchase on DVD. They are also streaming online at Stremio; however, if you live in either New York or Los Angeles, you can watch them, as I did, at the Paley Center for Media.

  1. “November: Jelly Roles,” by George Fels, Billiards Digest, November 2012.
  2. According to cuemaker Rick Geschrey, Red Baker was a top pocket billiards and three-cushion player. He “could beat top pros in money games on a regular basis. He competed with the likes [of] Greenleaf, Mosconi, Cochran and Hoppe and many others…Baker was on close terms with many in Hollywood and was often called in as a billiard consultant and stand-in. Close-ups of his hands have appeared in many television and movie sequences.”

Pool Tables: The Perfect Gift?

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Perhaps, my most prized physical possession is an eight-foot Olhausen Monarch pool table that I received as a gift when I turned 40. It’s an utter beauty, and it fulfilled a wish that started in college when I cut my first classes to play pool. As it happens, it also sparked my current avocation — blogging about billiards movies and television episodes.

With the holiday season upon us, now may be the time to give the gift of billiards and purchase a pool table – for the mancave, for the spouse-to-be, for the future Mosconi, for the family. The occasion does not matter; if it fits the house and the wallet, a pool table is a must-have. 

Or so I thought until I culled through the annals of pool table presents in pop culture. Unfortunately, the writers and directors behind some of the most relevant gifts in billiards-themed media have a rather different impression.

The 1950s-1960s

The bad press began in 1956, but I cannot tell you why. The economy was strong, unemployment was down to 4.5%, and all that disposable income was fostering a love affair with consumerism.

Nonetheless, in the April 1956 “Bad Companions” episode of The Goldbergs, one of television’s first family sitcoms, Uncle David brings home a new pool table as a “fabulous gift for the whole family.” But, it becomes an instant headache, since neither family nor friends can, or are allowed, to play. David recruits some “professors” from the local pool hall to teach him, unaware they are hustlers. As David’s house becomes ground zero for horse gambling and other nefarious activities, he is ultimately ensnared in a raid and decried by the judge as “the dupe of unsavory characters.” That might put your future pool table munificence in check.

One month later, the “Opportunity Knocks But” episode of The Honeymooners aired. Ralph Kramden’s boss receives a new pool table as an anniversary gift from his wife. Not knowing how to play, he invites Ralph (and ultimately Norton) to come over to teach the finer points of the game. While Ralph seizes on the invitation as an opportunity for endless sycophancy, Norton shoehorns his way into the game so he can pitch business ideas that ultimately lead to Norton getting selected over Kramden for a coveted job.   Now that is bad billiards mojo.

The Adventures of Ozzie and Harriet rounded out the year with the “Pool Table” episode. After Ozzie buys a pool table from the local department store, his playing plans are continually thwarted as he realizes he does not have a location for it. The pool table’s peregrination goes from the dining room to the kitchen to the garage to the outside yard and even to a neighbor’s house. Ultimately, Ozzie jerry-rigs a pulley system to haul the table up to the attic, but the table’s weight causes it to crash through the floor into the kids’ bedroom, rendering it largely useless for anyone taller than three feet.

Apparently the 1960s were consumed by other notable hobbies and activities, such as playing with GI Joes (1964) and Easy Bake Ovens (1963), watching the first Super Bowl (1966), or contorting to Twister (1966), as I could find no billiards gift-giving exemplars during the decade. 

1970s-1990s

But, by the 1970s, the billiards bestowal was back in cultural vogue, starting with the 1973 Sanford and Son episode “A House is Not a Poolroom,” which opens with Lamont getting his father Fred a pool table for his birthday. The present is so well-received that Lamont can neither get his father away from the table to attend to his family responsibilities, nor can he get any peace and privacy in the house, since his father’s gaggle of friends have now ‘moved in’ to use the table. Sadly, the magnetism of the table becomes such a problem that he must ultimately get rid of it.

Brady Bunch - The HustlerThe 1974 “The Hustler” episode of The Brady Bunch revealed Bobby Brady’s knack with a cue after his father brings home a pool table as a thank-you gift from his boss Mr. Matthews. Bobby trounces his brothers in 9-ball, thereby winning a month of free shoe-cleaning. But the real fun comes when Mr. Matthews visits the house and is subsequently thrashed by Bobby on the table, losing 256 packs of chewing gum in a wager. Unfortunately, for the squeaky-clean Brady clan, the home is no place for such games of sin, and the table is promptly returned.

After The Brady Bunch episode aired, a 30-year drought of billiards benevolence ensued. Pool hustling was all the rage in television and film, and nary a table appears to have been gifted.

2000s – present

That deficit was corrected in the mid-aughts, starting with Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston swapping barbs and bile in the 2006 movie The Break-Up, with each partner trying to outmaneuver the other in a bid to keep their luxurious condo. In one seminal scene, Vaughn’s character declares, “My whole life I always wanted my own place with my own pool table. I finally got my own place, but you would not allow me to get my own pool table. I figured I’d rectify that today.” As expected, this self-gifting causes a maelstrom of subsequent damage, with Aniston’s character violently ejecting his possessions from the room.

Finally, there is the little-watched series Gary Unmarried. At the center of the 2008 episode, “Gary Gets His Stuff Back,” is a pool table, which Gary gave to his ex-wife Allison as a paper anniversary gift, and now he threatens to reveal racy photographs of her if she doesn’t return it to him. Though the table leads to blackmail and burglary, there is a silver lining, as both characters divulge that the true reason they want the table is because of all the good memories associated with it.

Maybe that’s the underlying lesson from almost 70 years of billiards largesse on the silver screen. Regardless of what agonies and horrors are associated with the gift, pool tables are the loci of wonderful experiences.  Movies and television are make-believe, but pool tables as great gifts are most definitely very real.

Design Your Own Billiards Room

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At least since 1953, when Pathé News produced the 75-second film “Billiard Balls,” there have been documentaries, and later reality series, detailing the manufacturing and production of all the key components of billiards.

The Cuemaker - Billiards DocumentaryIn recent years, Mysteries of the Museum discussed John Wesley Hyatt’s invention of the celluloid billiard ball in the episode “Lunar Fender Bender, Opera Angels and Billiard Balls”; cue sticks were featured in both the documentary The Cuemaker and the Genuine Article episode “Puzzles and Pool Cues”; multiple series have revealed how pool tables are made (e.g., Furniture to Go – “Pool Table”; Handcrafted America – “Woven Rugs, Sunglasses and Billiard Tables”;  Incredible Inventions – “The Bow, Ferrofluid, The Billiard Table”); there’s even a Pakistani video from Ever Wondered on the making of billiard cue tip chalk.

So, it’s hardly a surprise that with all the attention shined on billiards equipment, producers would turn their attention to the sport’s homemade arena: the game room (or the billiard room, as fans of Clue might call it). Two series currently streaming on Discovery+, Color Splash and Stone House Revival, assume all the billiards gear is present and functional; it’s the room you need to build and design to play the game!

Color Splash – “Game On!”

Color Splash is an American home improvement series that aired on HGTV for eight seasons, from 2007 through 2012. Hosted by the affable and ever-increasingly tattooed designer David Bromstad, Color Splash focuses on giving rooms unforgettable makeovers through the dramatic use of color.

In the July 2007 episode “Game On!,” Mr. Bromstad and his accomplice, color specialist and carpenter Danielle Hirsch, are tasked with transforming an uninspiring, outdated game room into modern “man’s room but also for the family.” The room already has a pool table and an upright Mario Bros. arcade game, but per the wife’s direction, it needs to not only be comfortable, but also “warm and inviting.” 

Mr. Bromstad’s thesis is that a man’s space is “ literally a sectional couch, refrigerator, a TV, a pool table – awesome… everything else is just fluff so we need to make sure it’s not too fluffy.” He then goes deep into picking masculine greens and reds, creating customized valances, and building shelves to organize the electronics.  

But, since the billiards table is still central to the room’s design, he also leaves them with a picture of an eightball that he painted for them. “Because [the owner] absolutely loves pool, I wanted to do something he really loves.” 

Stone House Revival – “1760 Classic Colonial Parlor”

If you own a historic house around Bucks County, Pennsylvania, then the man you want to see is Jeff Devlin and the series you might appear on is Stone House Revival. Hosted by Mr. Devlin, Stone House Revival follows Jeff and his team of restoration experts who work with homeowners to help revive dilapidated structures into modern living spaces while preserving their historic integrity. The series ran from 2015 to 2021 on the DIY Network.

In the May 2016 episode “1760 Classic Colonial Parlor,” Mr. Devlin focuses on a Colonial home in Ivyland, Pennsylvania that was initially built in 1760 and then had a farmhouse added to it in 1810.  Decrepit as it may be, the farmhouse has real entertainment potential. The homeowners wish to convert it into two unique, usable spaces: a parlor and a billiards room.

As we learn from the pop-up historical notes, “billiard tables were popular in colonial America, dating back to 1722.” Mr. Devlin then proceeds to “turn [this] unused space into a really fun, functional billiard room” by adding a one-of-a-kind custom light pendant atop the pool table, adding dentil crown molding around the ceiling as a “nod to the time period,” redoing the floor slats with random width pine to match the parlor room, and exposing the original stone of a cabinet’s interior.  Oh yeah, he also wall mounts a billiard cue rack. 

Unfortunately, the actual billiards table – an unidentified, black-felted wooden one – becomes a bit of an afterthought, assembled in the background and otherwise unaddressed.

Gotham City Grind

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In film, sometimes the venue is the star. 

Meticulously selected, elegantly framed, perfectly lit, and cinematographically fine-tuned, the specific locale can be as memorable and essential as the actors, songs, script, or action.

Consider the old Ames Billiards Academy, a second-floor loft in the Claridge Hotel on West 44th in Times Square, that was home to the epic showdown between Fast Eddie Felson and Minnesota Fats in The Hustler. Or, the iconic, vintage Chris’s Billiards in Jefferson Park, Chicago, where Vince first duels with Grady Seasons in The Color of Money. For TruTV’s series The Hustlers, Steinway Billiards in Queens, New York, featured so prominently it was almost an hour-long advertisement. I don’t remember much about Penance except the awesome appearance of Top Shot Billiards in Alberta, where the movie was filmed in entirety.

Presumably, most venues would jump at the chance for this kind of product placement. But, when those starring roles don’t come knocking, there is always the last resort to create one’s own show. Such is the playbook Gotham City Billiards Club (GCBC) adopted in May 2016 when it launched the web series Gotham City Grind, featuring their Avenue U pool hall in Brooklyn as the homebase. 

Unfortunately, there are many good reasons why this path is not well-worn (e.g., cost, production value, lack of human interest, etc).  All of these reasons are on vivid display when one suffers through any of the four webisodes in the series.

Gotham City Grind opens with the voice-over, “This is not your average pool hall.  It may look like it, but Gotham City Billiards has an untold story, and our story begins with some of our usual players.” 

While the proclamation is well-intentioned, the series never actually tells the untold story.  Fine, whatever. The far greater gaffe is presuming that the “usual players” have a story that is interesting to anyone outside the pool hall’s doors. 

The first webisode, “Never Give Up,” focuses on Thomas Rice, a 17-year-old who turned to pool to counter his ADHD and struggles in school. Rice says, “I couldn’t focus in school and as soon as pool came into my life, it changed everything… started focusing better, winning tournaments, hanging out with the right kids not the wrong kids.” He then plays some nineball and prepares for an upcoming tournament.

That’s great, admirable even, but it’s hardly engaging video-watching. Maybe that’s why the webisode then abruptly shifts focus to Brooklyn denizen and actor William DeMeo, who is in town to promote his new film Back in the Day. (He was Jason Molinaro in seasons 5-6 of The Sopranos.) But, this is also a dead-end, an irrelevant cameo, unrelated to Thomas Rice, to GCBC, or even to billiards. We’re basically watching a pool hall promote itself promoting a straight-to-cable film that no one has heard of.

The second webisode, “American Dream,” is even worse; I found myself wistfully hoping for another D-list celebrity pop-up. Instead, we meet Koka Davladse from the Republic of Georgia. He is a “regular player with an infectious laugh” who came to America to study and play pool because “Georgia is dead, no tournaments, no payouts.” He has not seen his family in five years.

Awash with pathos, we then follow Koka’s storyline as it abruptly veers into a ten-round game of nineball against an opponent named Jerry T.  Koka wins, and the narrator rewards us with the platitude, “It takes courage and determination to follow your dreams. You have to want it bad enough. Most won’t even try, but whether you fail or succeed in the process, you have to believe in yourself.”

Stunned by such banality, I could not bring myself to watch the remaining two episodes, “Love for Pool” and “Legacy.” 

If you learn the untold story to GCBC, send it my way; otherwise, don’t waste your time grinding it out with Gotham City Grind.

 

Welcome to the Billiards Zoo

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Since the dawn of the green baize, there have been animals playing billiards:  Johnny “Scorpion” Archer. Alex “The Lion” Pagulayan. Jeanette “Black Widow” Lee. Horace “Groundhog” Godwin. Steve “The Whale” Melnyk. The zoological roll call of billiards monikers can go on and on.

The Secret of Magic Island

But, nicknames aside, animals have throughout the years picked up the cue stick to entertain. For example, costumed monkeys were shooting pool in an uncredited film from the 1930s. Far stranger is the 1957 French film, The Secret of Magic Island, in which real rabbits play pool (along with a picture-snapping dog and a motorbike-riding frog). Mister Ed, that famous TV Palomino, pocketed a shot in the eponymous 1964 episode “Ed the Pool Player.”  Today, it seems every animal even wants its 15 fifteen minutes of fame; YouTube  is rife with homemade videos of dogs, cats, and squirrels shooting stick. 

Well, this billiards menagerie better make some room. In the television episodes and short film below, there’s an international vivarium of dogs, chickens, toads, badgers, weasels, pigs, tigers, wolves, and bears ready to pot some shots.

Mad Dogs

Throughout the UK – and splattered across the internet – are kitschy paintings of dogs playing pool in pubs. This canine camp provided the perfect inspiration for the creative trio at Gadzooks Animation. Released in 2019, their film Mad Dogs is a seven-minute, stop-motion, animated film in which a nonet of regional British dogs discuss the quintessentials of British culture while drinking beers and shooting pool in a pub. Mad Dogs was created in response to Article 50, an open invitation to artists, commissioned by Sky Arts, the British 24-hour television channel, to define who the British are as a nation. It is available to watch here. 

The pint-drinking pack includes an English Foxhound, Afghan Hound, West Highland Terrier, English Bulldog, Old English Sheepdog, Scottish Terrier, Welsh Terrier, English Bull Terrier, and a Welsh Corgi. Each speaks with a specific regional accent. The dogs’ personalities are wonderfully distinct, and the dialogue hits the right mix of pride and pretense. 

My only gripe with Mad Dogs is after the English Bull Terrier takes its shot and rips the baize! How this faux pas doesn’t incite the crowd to a heightened level of rabble-rousing rabidity is the real unanswered question.

Chicken Stew

Cartoon history is replete with famous rivalries: Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote. Tweetie Pie and Sylvester the Cat. Bugs Bunny and Elmer Fudd.  To this list, add the chicken trio (Uncle Wattles, Free Range, and Small Fry) and weasel duo (Slim and Glutton) of the Chinese animation series Chicken Stew. 

First aired in 2009, Chicken Stew focuses on the weasels’ harebrained schemes in hapless pursuit of an elusive chicken dinner. In the 2011 episode “Blame It On Billiards,” available to watch (in Chinese) here, Uncle Wattles and Free Range are competing in a friendly, albeit dishonest, game of billiards. Tables are tilted, pockets are relocated, but it’s all in good fun, until Slim and Glutton try to weasel their way into the game. While their disguises work, their plans fall apart. Bombs go off, flying nunchaku come out, cue sticks are brandished, and poor ol’ Glutton gets a multi-billiard ball ass-whupping.1

Wind in the Willows

Noone likes to be told he’s a “social calamity,” least of all Mr. Toad, whose failure to understand the game of bridge leads him to purchase a billiards table, “a game no gentleman’s residence should be without.”

That’s the setup for “Champion of the Baize,” the 1987, Season 3 episode of Wind in the Willows, a British stop-motion animated series based on Kenneth Grahame’s classic children’s novel of the same name. The full episode is available to watch here.

While this dapper amphibian certainly has the means to buy the table, Mr. Toad is too proud to admit he has no idea how to play the game. This leads to some fairly jovial banter with Mole and Rat, who attempt to explain what a rest is, how to chalk one’s cue (or “pole”), and why the object of the game is not to bounce the ball off as many “things” as possible.

But, when two weasel passersby hear the “sound of ivory on ivory,” they challenge Mr. Toad to a game of snooker, and that’s when his vainglory becomes more of a problem. Flattered by the weasels, Mr. Toad is hustled into wagering his motorcar, which he quickly loses to the more skillful opponent. However, in a scene reminiscent of the Fresh Prince episode “Banks Shot,” Mr. Toad’s elderly friend Badger requests a match, feigns ignorance about the required sequence to pot the snooker balls, and then proceeds to hustle the weasel in a 7-0 run, promptly winning back the auto. 

For all its British formality, “Champion of the Baize” is a wonderfully enjoyable television episode that shows a great appreciation for snooker. A considerable number of minutes is devoted to the matches, in which backspin features prominently and the shots are at least somewhat realistic in their execution.

Masha and the Bear

“That’s Your Cue” is a seven-minute billiards episode from the Russian animated television series Masha and the Bear. Join 11.6 million other viewers (!!) to watch the Season 3 episode on YouTube.

First aired in July 2018, “That’s Your Cue” begins with Whiskers n’ Stripes, a Siberian Tiger, visiting his circus friend, a retired Kamchatka brown bear, in the forest and surprising him with a billiards table.  They decide to hold a billiards tournament, and quickly enter the forest to source players.

While they’re gone, three-year-old Masha enters the bear’s house and innocently swaps the billiards balls with a set of numbered blocks. When the tiger and bear return, along with six additional competitors – a Himalayan black bear, two gray wolves, a she-bear, a cat, and Rosie the pig – they are startled to find the balls missing. But, the tiger is undeterred and convinces his furry brethren to improvise and use the blocks as balls instead.  

So begins the elimination tournament that ultimately ends with Rosie pocketing cubes one through seven in a single break and then sinking the eight-cube to beat his gargantuan opponent, the Himalayan bear. 

That rounds out our billiards animal kingdom. To the best of my knowledge, no animals were harmed in the shooting of these billiards sequences…though more than a few had their egos bruised.

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  1. For other cartoon nemeses battling on the baize, check out Tom and Jerry (“Cue Ball Cat”) or Woody Woodpecker and Buzz Buzzard (“Cue the Pool Shark”).

American Chopper – “Jeanette Lee Black Widow Bike”

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Lamentably, many Amercians cannot name a professional billiards player alive today. But, among those who can, one name is likely to arise often: Jeanette Lee, aka The Black Widow.

Though Ms. Lee has lately garnered headlines for her recent announcement of stage 4 ovarian cancer (on top of the scoliosis she has fought against since age 12), her billiards accomplishments are legendary. A former No. 1 female pool player in the world; a three times runner-up at the women’s World Nine-ball Championship; the Women’s Professional Billiard Association (WPBA) Sportsperson of the Year Award in 1998; a gold medal winner for the United States at the 2001 World Games in Akita, Japan; and an inductee into the Billiard Congress of America Hall of Fame in 2013.

Those achievements, coupled with her statuesque looks and distinct visual style, have led to her off-the-baize success and fame.  Ms. Lee has appeared in film (e.g., 9-Ball), television (e.g., Arli$$; Cake Boss – “Painters, Pool and Pink,”), and commercials (e.g., Ford Explorer); she has been profiled in Sports Illustrated; she has been photographed for the ESPN Body Issue; she has even authored a book:  The Black Widow’s Guide to Killer Pool: Become the Player to Beat.

So, perhaps it’s not a surprise that Ms. Lee’s cultural stardom also took her to Newburgh, New York, where she joined Paul Teutal Sr. (aka Senior) and his team at Orange County Choppers (OCC) to create a customized Black Widow motorcycle on the reality television series American Chopper.1 

Produced by Pilgrim Films & Television, American Chopper ran for six seasons, initially on the Discovery Channel and then TLC.  Ms. Lee appears in the series’ sixth season on the December 2009 episode, “Jeanette Lee Black Widow Bike.”

The episode begins with Ms. Lee entering OCC’s retail shop to demonstrate some trick shots, including hitting the 8-ball out of Senior’s mouth into the corner pocket, and then exchanging banter with Senior while playing him in several games of eightball. 

At the end of the games, Ms. Lee shares that ever since the OCC introduced their original Black Widow bike (from the first season of American Chopper), she’s been fielding calls from fans, who mistakenly think it was named after her. So, she wants one, customized for her, that she can take on the road.2 

The bulk of the episode is then focused on the assembly of her chopper. The goal is to leverage the standard Black Widow frame, but add some “wow” to make it truly unique. The decision-making process covers the tank selection, the fabrication of the fenders (with their three-dimensional webbing welding), and the simplification of the seat design.

After two days of assembly, Senior unveils the custom Black Widow bike at the Seminole Hard Rock Casino in Fort Lauderdale, Florida, where Ms. Lee is participating in a WPBA tournament.  Ms. Lee looks genuinely thrilled by the chopper. Her husband, George Breedlove, looks a bit more distressed.  Asked for her reaction, Ms. Lee says, “It’s beautiful, sexy, strong, but it’s feminine…it’s hot, it’s a hot bike. I’m feeling some fire.”

The “Jeanette Lee Black Widow Bike” episode of American Chopper is available to stream on Discovery+.

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1. Interestingly, this was not the first vehicle renovation reality series to include billiards. A few years earlier, the rapper Xzibit “pimped” a 1988 Chevrolet S10 with a built-in pool table on the show Pimp My Ride.

2. In fact, OCC was commissioned by LiquidWick Pool Cues, which signed Ms. Lee to a multi-year contract at the end of 2007, to build the custom bike for her. As is made apparent at the end of the episode, Ms. Lee is not a motorcyclist, even nervously asking what is the “throttle.”

Dude Perfect – “Pool Trick Shots”

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Dude Perfect may sound like the name of a frat-bro Venice beach cover band, but the moniker belies one of the world’s foremost sports content marketing juggernauts. Consisting of five former Texas A&M college roommates, Dude Perfect has created an eponymous YouTube channel with more than 57 million subscribers. Those numbers make it the second most popular sports YouTube channel and the 21st overall most subscribed YouTube channel.

Since launching in 2009 and shortly thereafter setting the Guinness world record for the longest basketball shot after shooting from the third deck of the Aggies football field, they have produced videos consisting of various sports trick shots, stunts, and battles, and in turn, have amassed more than 14.2 billion views (and 14 Guinness records).

Many celebrities have starred in the Dude Perfect videos, including Green Bay Packer Aaron Rodgers, Phoenix Sun Chris Paul, Australian ten-pin bowler Jason Belmonte, actor Paul Rudd, country singer Tim McGraw, beach volleyball star Morgan Beck, NASCAR drivers Ricky Stenhouse Jr., and tennis player Serena Williams. 

Not surprisingly, that star-studded guest list also includes world-renowned billiards trick shot artist Florian “Venom” Kohler, who appeared with the Dude Perfect quintet in “Pool Trick Shots” (December 2014) and again in “Pool Trick Shots 2” (February 2017).

Mr. Kohler is himself a bit of a YouTube wunderkind.  His jaw-dropping trick shots, which often involve ball jumping, massé-ing with multiple cues simultaneously, executing jump and massé shots on moving balls, and executing very high jumps, are mesmerizing. In a world where less than one percent of all YouTube videos exceed 100,000 views, Mr. Kohler’s posts, such as “Sexy Bikini Trick Shots” and “Sexy Pool Trick Shots” (featuring his wife Iana), have generated 14 million and 22 million views, respectively.

But, when you marry Mr. Kohler’s billiards mastery with the global reach and antics of Dude Perfect, it takes trick shots to a whole different level.

“Pool Trick Shots”

Mr. Kohler’s first appearance on Dude Perfect feels like a match made in high-fiving, fist-bumping, bro-hugging heaven. For fans of his milieu, the episode provides the opportunity to expand his viewership by 4-5x, while making shots that are creatively named, albeit somewhat familiar. They include the Curling Coffin Corner, the Beard Trimmer, the Jumbo Curve, and the aptly-named “Cody [Jones] + Ty[ler Toney] Trust Shot,” in which Mr. Kohler jumps a ball off the table into a clay target that is precariously nestled just below Cody and Ty’s genitals.

Whereas other Dude Perfect videos often feature the famous five performing the athletic feats, this webisode largely celebrates Mr. Kohler’s accomplishments, though the guys do make some impressive shots, including hitting two billiards balls from opposite directions into opposing corner pockets at the same time. 

“Pool Trick Shots” now has 79 million views and is available to watch here.

Pool Trick Shots 2 

Twenty-six months after his Dude Perfect debut, Mr. Kohler returned, bigger and ballsier – literally – than before. For starters, the “Trust Shot” from 2014 has been upped, with all five Dude Perfect members putting their nuts in the crosshairs. But that shot is pocket change compared to the Upper Decker Hole in One, in which Mr. Kohler shoots a billiards ball 28 yards out from a second-floor balcony onto a table, and then hits a second ball into that airborne ball pocketing it into a first floor golf hole.

Once again, the bro-clan celebrates every shot like they won the lottery. They make a few of their own creative shots, such as shooting a billiards-ball-tipped arrow onto a table, where it caroms three balls into three pockets; or, dressing up like a giant panda, slap shot a puck from one table on to another table, where it hits a ball into a pocket.

The webisode’s grand finale is the “Ty Trust Shot,” a shot so complex it’s hard to explain, but I will try. Mr. Kohler bounces a cue ball off a rail, hits that ball mid-air into a vertical trampoline, causing the ball to leap over the first table, when it then bounces off a rail on a second table and subsequently shatters a sugar glass perched atop of Ty’s head.

“Pool Trick Shots 2,” now with 81 million views, is available to watch here.

Billiards, Korean Style

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Almost 7000 miles away, the billiards market is booming in Korea, as recently reported by the Seoul Daily News.  About 16 percent of the population enjoys playing the sport, especially various versions of carom billiards, such as three-cushion, pocketball and sagu.1

Sang Lee, who moved from Korea to New York at the age of 33, was dubbed the “Michael Jordan of three-cushion billiards” in the ‘90s, winning 12  consecutive United States Billiard Association National Three-Cushion Championships as well as the Three-Cushion World Cup-Champion in 1993.

Other Korean players, while not yet household names, have ascended in the ranks, including “Little Devil Girl” Kim Ga-young, Kim Haeng-jik,  Jae-Ho Cho, Cha Yu-ram, and Cambodian-born Sruong Pheavy.2 Kim Kyung-roul was another up-and-coming master, until he tragically died falling out of his apartment window at the age of 34.

Given the sport’s increasing popularity and rising young stars, it’s not surprising to see a wide array of Korean movies and television shows, ranging from cartoons to reality shows to dramas, featuring billiards. Most I’ve watched; one continues to elude my grasp; all present a panoply of billiards viewing, both good and bad.

Cue

The earliest example I’ve discovered of billiards on celluloid in Korea is the 1996 drama Cue.  Incredibly little is known about the film, except that it focused on “personal and professional jealousies in the high-stakes world of competitive pool, in which a female player seeks to become champion after the long-reigning champ is defeated.” Cue is not even listed on the IMDB filmography for the movie’s lead actor Lee Deok-Hwa. If you have any information on this movie, please share with me.

Bernard – “Billiards”

Known as Backkom in its native South Korea, the South Korean-Spanish-France computer animated television Bernard series centers on a curious polar bear named Bernard, whose bumbling slapstick antics typically result in the bear being knocked unconscious or being severely injured by the end of an episode.

In the “Billiards” episode, which aired sometime between 2006 and 2012, Bernard competes in a game of nine-ball against his lizard pal Zack.  Bernard has a strong break and some modicum of talent, but he’s no match for his lacertilian opponent. His attempts to sabotage Zack’s game appear to work until Bernard slips on a discarded ball, banging his head on the side table, and falling unconscious. The episode is available to watch here.

High Kick 3: Revenge of the Short Legged – “Episode 40”

The South Korean sitcom, High Kick 3, aired from September 2011 to March 2012. In those seven months, there were 123 episodes, including “Episode 40,” in which Kang Seung Yun declares himself an unbeatable “pool genius,” a “pool god…born with a pool stick in his hand.” Unconvinced, Dr. Yoon Gye Sang, a “master of studying,” challenges Seung Yun, proffering that anyone can play pool based on understanding the science and reading the books. He avers, “A smart person who understands the equation can possibly do better with less practice.”

Their classmates choose sides and place bets, with the loser owing the winner a chicken dinner. As it turns out, Seung Yun shoots a mean game of three-cushion billiards.  Dr. Yoon, not so much.  After blabbering calculations about the average number of shots required and commenting on the “tripod grip” for maximum effect, he scratches on the first shot, and it’s all downhill from there. 

Long Inside Angle Shot

In 2014, the New York Asian Film Festival, widely revered for its showings of many first-and-only screenings of Eastern Asian and Southeast Asian cinema, premiered Long Inside Angle Shot from Korea’s Mise-en-scène Short Film Festival.

Released in 2012, the film focuses on a middle-aged woman who seemingly does nothing but watch sagu, a variant of four-ball billiards, on the television. Initially believing she does not even understand the sport, her son Tae-bong realizes this is more than a passive hobby of hers when she reveals to him she has drained his bank account to purchase a new billiards hall.  The impetus for the idea was a dream she had in which a Buddhist monk played billiards with a wooden cane.

Unfortunately, the dream didn’t include customers, and tensions mount with the pair’s increasing poverty. But, Tae-bong’s disbelief and rage is put in check after his mother challenges him to a game of sagu, and he appreciates that her TV-watching intensity is matched by her incredible billiards acumen. She not only makes a beautiful masse shot, but also the titular long inside angle shot.

The movie is available to watch below.

 

Drama Stage – “Not Played”

Lasting four seasons, Drama Stage was a South Korean weekly television program that featured ten one-act dramas per season. The first season included the 2018 episode “Not Played” about a woman in her 60s (Won Mi Kyung) who, having spent her life caring for children and housekeeping, accidentally stumbles across a part-time job at a billiard hall and discovers her talent for the sport. 

Initially apprehensive, she begins to secretly practice three-cushion billiards in the after hours, and watches tournament footage to improve her fundamentals.  When the hall’s proprietor learns of her innate skills, he trains her and encourages her to go all-in. Soon, she is competing against local sharks and, to the dismay of her husband, considering entering a tournament. 

I give a lot of originality points to the premise of this episode. Not a lot of billiards shows feature women; none star sexagenerians, though ironically the sagu-playing mother of Long Inside Angle Shot was probably pretty close in age. “Not Played” also avoids all the standard tropes of hustling, barrooms, trick shots, down-and-out players, and chooses instead to focus on an individual who discovers a newfound passion late in her life. 

Unfortunately, YouTube’s closed caption auto-translate subtitles were pretty muddled, so most of the dialogue was lost in translation. You can watch the full episode below.

Sixball

My favorite billiards film to come out of South Korea is Sixball, which was released in May 2020. This feature-length film from director Chae Ki-jun focuses on Sung-hoon (Lee Dae-han), a one-time aspiring professional billiards player whose dreams were shattered (and hand was broken) after getting cheated in a game of sixball by the gangster Mr. Yong (Hong Dal-pyo). As Sung-hoon is eventually lured back to billiards by his friend, who promises him the opportunity to make easy money betting in doubles billiards, he also finds himself with the perfect revenge opportunity, if he can survive his ultimate billiards match. 

While the plot is formulaic, Sixball works because it energetically doubles-down on certain high-octane elements, such as elegant straight rail carom billiards matches, a menacing and villainous adversary, layers of voyeurism and fetishism of women, and a riveting climactic match with one jaw-dropper of a shot.  You can read my full review here.

L.O.Λ.E STORY: INSIDE OUT – “Ready, Cue! Pocket Billiard”

Rounding out the septet is L.O.Λ.E STORY: INSIDE OUT, a new variety web series that portrays a more humble side to JR, Aron, Baekho, Minhyun, and Ren, the five members of the South Korean boy band NU’EST. 

The fifth webisode is “Ready, Cue! Pocket Billiard,” which aired in June 2021. It already has 85,000 views and more than 8,000 likes, but I found it beyond painful to watch (though I recognize I’m hardly the target demographic). In Ready, Cue!… the five musicians meet in a billiards hall. Initially they attempt to play carom billiards, but quickly give up and switch tables to play eight-ball.  However, each of the players is worse than the next, so there is an insufferable litany of misses, scratches, miscues, often replayed with sound effects. There is a twist toward the end as Minhyun starts making his shots, making the others question if he was hustling them. But, I was more concerned with how many more minutes of this series I needed to endure. You can watch the full episode here.

  1. https://www.statista.com/statistics/1049761/south-korea-billiards-participation-rate-by-age/
  2. Of course, the world’s most well-known Korean player is likely “The Black Widow” Jeanette Lee. However, she was born in Brooklyn, New York.

One More Top 10 Billiards Commercial List

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With a teeth-clenching finale, the Los Angeles Rams edged out the Cincinnati Bengals 23-20, bringing a blue-and-yellow confetti-drenched close to Super Bowl LVI. The game was truly historical, and not just because Sean McVay was the youngest coach to win the coveted trophy or quarterback Joe Burrow got sacked seven times. History was made off the field, as advertisers paid an average of $6.5 million for a 30-second spot; some spots allegedly sold for almost $7 million.[1] Maybe it’s worth it. According to Nielsen, 27%-50% of the 100 million viewers prefer the commercials to the game.

Regrettably, billiards had only a fleeting cameo this year when professional golfer Brooks Koepka put down the cue stick to pick up the bowling ball in Michelob Ultra’s “Welcome to Superior Bowl” campaign. (In comparison, billiards was a prominent player in Super Bowl XXXV during Dentyne’s CGI-heavy “Pool Hall” commercial, as well as Super Bowl XLVIII, when Bob Dylan casually played pool toward the end of Chrysler’s two-minute spot.)

Brooks Kopeka (Michelob Ultra, “Welcome to Superior Bowl”)

Billiards may have been absent from this weekend’s big game, but the sport has been a mainstay of commercials across the globe for many years, as I have shared in my previous blog posts, Top 10 Billiards Breaks and Another Top 10 Billiards Commercial List. So, as a salute to the advertising record-breakers, I present One More Top 10 Billiards Commercial List, complete with 10 billiards commercials from around-the-world that are entirely different from those cited on my other two lists. Let the Clio ceremony begin!

10. Trebor Softmints. In 1984, Jimmy White not only won the Masters snooker tournament, and the World Doubles Championships with his partner Alex Higgins, but he also starred in an advertisement for England’s famous “minty bit stronger” confectionery Trebor Softmints. In this particular commercial, “The Whirlwind” hastily clears the table on his opponent Tornado Thompson because the snooker match is the only obstacle in the way of his next Softmint.

9. Roshan. At first glance, this 2012 “Pool Hall” commercial is hardly list-worthy. It features a quintet of friends amiably and not so successfully playing snooker. But the commercial is for Roshan, the largest telecom provider in Afghanistan. That makes “Pool Table” the first Afghan artifact I have encountered showing billiards on the screen. And, it’s an impressive turnaround for the sport, given a decade before the commercial aired, snooker was banned by the Taliban.

8. Cream Silk. Shanelle Loraine is arguably the Anna Kournikova of billiards; if not for her incredible looks, nobody would be talking about her. Consider the facts: in 2010, Unilever turned to this “Billiards Champion” (!?) to market the “beauty and power” of its hair conditioner in this commercial, though her tournament earnings were just $315 that year and her position on the AZB leaderboard was 1,288. Maybe that’s why the commercial ends with a cheap-o trick shot.

7. Goldfish Epic Crunch Nacho. Like Oddjob crushing the golf ball in Goldfinger, so too does Epic Crunch Nacho, our goldfish-headed superhero, prove his strength and “powerful crunch” by interrupting a friendly pool match to crush an eight-ball with his bare hand. Created by Young & Rubicam, this 2019 “Billiards” commercial may have won over salty snack lovers, but it left billiards fans howling in protest about the poor sportsmanship, never mind the impact it had on our heroine Pretzel.

6. Rolex. Any advertisement that includes the iconic scene from The Color of Money when Paul Newman sees his reflection in the two-ball and forfeits the semifinal match is going to make this list. The fact that Rolex beautifully showcased not only this scene, but also clips from 18 other films, such as Network, Speed, Titanic, Selma, and Apocalypse Now, in its 2017 “Celebrating Cinema” commercial, is truly mesmerizing and impressive. The common denominator? All the featured characters are wearing Rolexes, many as a personal choice, rather than a PR stunt.[2] 

5. Bud Light. By my count, Budweiser has created seven commercials that prominently showcase billiards, including the Reserve Copper Lager ad mentioned further down in this list. The 1995 “Pool Table” commercial, which followed up the ground-breaking “Ladies Night” commercial from 1993, features a quartet of men, dressed as women, competing in a Ladies Night Finals of Pool to win Bud Light. As Thin Lizzy’s “The Boys are Back in Town” belts from the jukebox, the drag queens dazzle onlookers with their masse, draw, and trick shots, even if some are not fully convinced of their overall qualifications.

4. Venus and Mars. Following the success of Band on the Run, Paul McCartney and the Wings released their 1975 album, Venus and Mars, with its album cover photograph of two billiards balls depicting the nearby planets. The album reached #1 in the United States, a feat perhaps aided by a 60-second television commercial of the Wings members playing snooker, acting goofy and singing songs from the album, including the popular single “Listen to What the Man Said.” The advertisement, directed by Karel Reisz, who would later get an Oscar nomination for The French Lieutenant’s Woman, had been assumed lost, but Sir McCartney pulled it from the vaults as part of the 2014 re-release of Venus and Mars

3. Budweiser Reserve Copper Lager. Originally created for Super Bowl LIII, but then shelved so it could premier during the Oscars a few months later, the 2019 “Hold My Beer” commercial stars all-around badass Charlize Theron humiliating a series of men in various bar sports. Set to Run DMC’s “Tricky,” Theron singlehandedly – and by that, I further mean she competes with a single hand since her other hand holds a frothy Bud (as opposed to having only one hand a la her Fury Road character Furiosa) – whups her opponents in billiards, darts, and arm wrestling.

2. Lincoln Nautilus. After filming The Lincoln Lawyer in 2011, it was only natural for Matthew McConaughey to become Lincoln’s pitchman, appearing in numerous commercials for the auto manufacturer since 2014. One ad from 2019 featured McConaughey stepping away from his dinner guests to make a trick billiards shot in which the object ball weaves between other balls. The idea was that like the table shot, the Nautilus driver can keep control thanks to advanced driver aids. If you think that comparison is a stretch, you likely have good company. Fortunately, Lincoln released a subsequent two-minute ad on Facebook, this time with professional trick shot artist Steve Markle, who “demonstrates” specific aspects of Lincoln’s Co-Pilot 360 Technology (e.g., Lane Keeping System, Post Collision Braking) through a series of birds eye-viewed beautiful trick shots. Talk about pool is cool.

1. MANSCAPED Lawn Mower. Commercials don’t get more outré or laugh-out-loud than this 2021 “Pool Table” commercial, with the opening line, “We need to talk about your balls.” Over a thick jazzy bass line, the narrating snooker player asks the hard questions, such as, “Are [your balls] smooth or covered in bits of annoying fluff?” He then shows his (snooker) balls, which “glisten in the light,” while offering a modicum of hope to viewers that their balls can be similar, assuming they use the right tools (no weed-whackers, blowtorches, or cheese graters). The commercial’s final note of optimism is a potted shot, while the narrator warns us, “When it comes to balls you don’t want to muck about.” Cue the YouTube fan base.

Bottom line: if an unknown team like the Cincinnati Bengals can make it to the Super Bowl, then anything can happen during the world’s greatest gridiron game. So why not a few more billiard-themed commercials in the future and give billiards, perhaps the greatest underdog sport, a chance at stardom?

[1]      Super Bowl 2022: Soaring COVID-era ad spots a ‘sign of the times’ for brands

[2]      Rolex Went ‘Rolex Spotting’

Top of the Heap – “Behind the Eight Ball”

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Top of the Heap is truly the bottom of the barrel.

Granted, I only watched “Behind the Eight Ball,” the series’ third episode that aired in April, 1991.  But, there is a reason this Married… with Children spinoff only lasted seven episodes. It’s comedic dregs, sitcom sludge, the sort of show even a laugh track finds humorless.

Top of the Heap focuses on the attempts of Charlie Verducci (Joseph Bologna) and his son Vinnie (Matt LeBlanc)—to get rich. Charlie’s “master plan” is for Vinnie to marry into a wealthy family; to this end, the father-son duo tries to break into high society, which includes Vinnie getting a job at a country club and Charlie pining for the club’s manager Alixandra Stone (Rita Moreno).

(How Mr. LeBlanc ever rebounded from this dumpster fire to join the cast of Friends three years later and ultimately earn $1 million per episode defies explanation.)

In “Behind the Eight Ball,” Charlie is concerned that Alixandra may have eyes for Warren Prado, a wealthy new club member, so Charlie tries to hustle him in a game of nineball.  However, after witnessing someone call the man “Godfather” and kiss his hand, he quickly starts to backpedal, fearing for his life and “spelling help in [his] underwear.”

The acting is robotic, and the jokes are cringeworthy, but there are few highlights worth mentioning. Joey Lauren Adams plays Vinnie’s high school-aged neighbor (two years before her first major role in Dazed and Confused); Christina Applegate, reprising her Kelly Bundy role, appears for continuity’s sake; and two former Playboy models, Heather Parkhurst and a 24-year-old Pamela Anderson, show up to… show off. There are also two enjoyable trick shots, including one that entails hitting five balls into four pockets with one shot.

But it’s hard to muster a smile amidst the egregious billiards inaccuracies, such as when the cue ball is ricocheted into a nearby aquarium and then miraculously appears on the table in the next shot. Or, in a game of nine-ball, when Charlie’s opponent sinks the nine with the cue, while leaving the two on the table (?!).

William Finnegan, The “Godfather of Pool”

It’s hardly a spoiler, but Mr. Prado turns out not to be that kind of godfather, but rather just some bub’s male sponsor. Of course, this got me thinking: what is the relation between billiards and criminal godfathers? Or, even better, between billiards and The Godfather? 

For starters, several players have adopted the nickname “The Godfather,” including Taiwan’s Zhuang Zhiyuan and the Phillipines’ Aristeo “Putch” Puyat. Readers of my blog may also recall Steinway-Café Billiards regular William Finnegan, the self-proclaimed “Godfather of Pool,” who has appeared in multiple billiards reality shows, including The Hustlers, the “Emily” episode of In A Man’s World, and Kiss of Death.

Though none of these individuals appear connected to the mafia, the game of billiards has on occasion been associated with illegal activity, specifically gambling.  So much so that in the 1920s, the Illinois Billiards Association was committed to keeping crime and booze out of billiards halls, as part of their “clean billiards crusade.” And before Johnny Torrio built the Chicago Outfit and turned loose his protégé Al Capone, he got his start in crime by opening a local pool hall in New York, where he ran an illegal gambling operation.  More recently, Gerald Huber recounts many “war stories” of billiards, gambling, and mobsters in his autobiography The Green Felt Jungle.

Unfortunately, Mario Puzo and Francis Ford Coppola chose to ignore the underworld billiards connection in writing and directing The Godfather movies.

Andy Garcia looking bored in “The Godfather III”

While plenty of gangster films have noteworthy billiards scenes (e.g, Mean Streets; The Krays; The Departed), the only billiards scene in Mr. Coppola’s trilogy is an unmemorable dialogue in The Godfather III between Connie Corleone (Talia Shire) and her nephew Vincent (Andy Garcia), while he is playing pool. 

That’s a shame, given the iconic Hearst Estate mansion that was used in The Godfather as the home of movie producer Jack Woltz included a 32-foot-high billiards room. 

It’s not like the Corleones – or at least, the actors who played them – didn’t know how to shoot billiards.

Marlon Brando in “Viva Zapata”

Twenty years before Marlon Brando became the Don, he was playing pool off set with his Viva Zapata co-star Anthony Quinn. So too did Robert DeNiro, the younger Vito of The Godfather II. He was quite happy at the table, as seen in The Deer Hunter. 

Sonny Corleone’s gangster career may have been short-lived, but actor James Caan moved forward, picking up a cue stick one year later in Cinderella Liberty and then again – on horseback! – in Another Man, Another Chance. And, the incoming godfather, Al Pacino, makes one of the best “magic time” shots in eightball a decade later as Carlito Brigante in Carlito’s Way.

As for Fredo…poor Fredo. He wanted to be at the top of heap, but he took sides against the family and truly wound up behind the eight ball.

The “Behind the Eight Ball” episode of Top of the Heap is available to watch below on YouTube.